How To Impress A Girl, Or Not
How to impress a girl is a great conundrum. No one really knows the answer to it, but one thing is certain. Under normal circumstances most deliberate efforts to appear impressive fail miserably.
The paradox follows that the best way to win favor is not to try. This method often has desirable consequences but is extremely difficult to achieve. If one likes the look of a girl, as sure as night follows day one will find oneself trying to curry favor.
Girls will mostly like this because watching males trying to ingratiate themselves has long been a favorite form of female entertainment. It is not only entertaining but also extremely satisfying. The female heart swells with satisfaction when a strapping male prostrates himself at her feet. Unfortunately the urge to spurn him with a delicate female foot is almost irresistible.
This may be why cave men used the club and hair method and did not bother with fine forms of persuasion. However in the bird and animal worlds many amazing techniques of persuasion are employed. Birds dance and display their feathers; bulls below and paw the ground and even fish have ways of displaying themselves to advantage.
One thing that distinguishes human beings from other creatures on earth is a capacity for language. Where birds have feathers and mountain goats have thick skulls human beings have words. A sonnet is a poem of fourteen lines designed to charm a girl through flattery and wit. Being short it could be delivered into a castle and impress a lady with its eloquence.
It might seem that the present argument that it is best not try is contradicted by pop musicians and their wild gyrations. They frantically wave their electric guitars around like extended penises and seem to know how to impress a girl by the energy of their antics. However, performing for a seething mob is quite a far cry from facing a discriminating female across a room.
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